MisterHippity

e-mail: misterhippity(at)yahoo.com • Ask me anything!

My writings for: GawkerThe AwlWordsmoker

January 27, 2012 at 6:10pm
15 notes
“Dear Cyber Woman with Corn: It’s me, Max. How are you?”
This is the best thing I’ve read on Gawker all year.

“Dear Cyber Woman with Corn: It’s me, Max. How are you?”

This is the best thing I’ve read on Gawker all year.

2:39pm
0 notes
That may seem kind of lenient, but the prison he’s being sent to has really gross, sticky floors.

That may seem kind of lenient, but the prison he’s being sent to has really gross, sticky floors.

12:17am
0 notes
According to Google Translate, that means “I am, therefore, a dish.”
That’s a good motto!

According to Google Translate, that means “I am, therefore, a dish.”

That’s a good motto!

January 26, 2012 at 8:45pm
1 note

"... remember our live-blogging motto: 'dico ergo sum'—which, roughly translated, means 'I comment, therefore I am.'" →

Our Project Runway commenter live blog starts in 15 minutes. Join us!

(And if tech problems have kept you away, come back! The Gawker commenting system is working again! Halleluiah!)

4:42pm
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Here are a few of my favorite comments from our last Project Runway live blog on Gawker. (Join us for the next one tonight!The post goes up on Gawker at 8 pm Eastern, and the show starts at 9!)

AubreySilver I think Miss Piggy is a better Judge than say, Kim Kardashian. She’s also probably had fewer fingers up her ass.

GoOnWithoutMe No one put a little hole in their outfit for the corkscrew tail?

just.a.smore Yes, there is serious concern of a nip slip on a felt pig. Good point. 

Doreen DelPurgatorio With the PiperLime wall, we never saw the designers even interact with that crap. Now that it’s Nieman-Marcus, all of a sudden they’re clawing like it’s Wal-Mart on Black Friday.

BabyJane You do not really believe that this is the best challenge ever, Joanna Coles. You are a lying liar who lies.

NikkiChicky “Miss Piggy Goes To Prison,” by Mila

unclevanya OK Gossip Gay is already a poser in my eyes, he starts off his sentences with “As a professional designer and a professional stylist…” Poof! You’re pretentious!

cynicalbitch Maybe next week they can design a dress for Wilma Flinstone.

Pyewacket @cynicalbitch Georgina Chapman’s already wearing it.

January 25, 2012 at 11:54pm
1 note

"After commenter BabyJane made a 'just for the halibut' pun, GoOnWithoutMe and just.a.smore used the words 'smelt' and 'crappie' to describe it. That's right: commenters were actually making fish puns about a fish pun." →

2:16pm
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Listed below are a few of my favorite comments from our latest Top Chef live blog on Gawker. (Join us for the next one tonight! The post goes up at 9 pm Eastern, and the show starts at 10!)

Capt.Snarky I see Padma’s got her “alien of the week from the third season of Star Trek: TNG” outfit on.

robina the first I love that the conveyor belt is fucking with Samurai Chris. Well played, conveyor belt!

dippitydoo It’s the Lazy Susan from hell.

BabyJane “Snow White and Jon Huntsman” sounds like a terrible movie.

GonzoMaz Your dream is to cook for Charlize Theron, Sarah? Better hike my pants up. Bullshit’s a-risin’!

Havisham Bridal Party Whoa, Samurai Jack is married to a woman? I would have thought he hung out with a Real Doll all day.

just.a.smore Everyone knew Pebbles would marry Bam Bam in the end.

Pop Socket The scallops were cooked perfectly and the risotto was good? I’m not sure this is Top Chef any more.

bittebitte Blasphemy, Emeril! There’s no such thing as too much cheese!

unclevanya Here come the pleas for mercy…Kleenex and kneepads, engage!

1:44pm
4 notes
Jesus, Gawker … make up your mind already!

Jesus, Gawker … make up your mind already!

January 23, 2012 at 10:46pm
9 notes
Will Lil’ Newt win the trophy again tonight?
(Source)

Will Lil’ Newt win the trophy again tonight?

(Source)

January 22, 2012 at 2:23pm
4 notes

Here’s a message from Gabrielle Giffords, explaining her decision to resign from congress.

This is just so heartbreaking, it’s hard to watch.

January 21, 2012 at 4:42pm
2 notes

You, too, could be a Hollywood screenwriter!

Here are some “memorable quotes” from the “The Smurfs” movie, according to IMDB:

Smurfette: Oh… my… Smurf.

Grouchy: Where the Smurf are we?

Gutsy: Up the smurfin’ creek without a paddle, that’s where!

Grouchy: Let’s get our Smurf on!

Clumsy: Keep your smurfs to yourself!

Smurfette: You smurfed with the wrong girl!

Patrick Winslow: SMURF, SMURF, SMURFITY, SMURF!

January 20, 2012 at 1:39pm
1 note
UPDATE: She died in California.
UPDATE: Did we mention leukemia?

UPDATE: She died in California.

UPDATE: Did we mention leukemia?

1:34pm
0 notes

January 19, 2012 at 3:45pm
0 notes

Here are a few of my favorite comments from last week’s Project Runway live blog on Gawker. (Join us for the next one tonight! The post will go up on Gawker at 8 pm, and the show starts at 9.)

just.a.smore Anecdote: My highschool boyfriend won me a two-liter bottle of “Sweet Pea” scented linen spray at grad night. I imagine all of Sweet P’s designs smell like it.

Havisham Bridal Party Does April know how to use colors that don’t make her model look like a vampire?

Lizawithazee The Romulan is pleased to watch the human self destruct.

BobbleTimGunn “I want my model to channel Angelina Jolie so I’m accessorizing her with 6 children from the Neiman Marcus accessory wall.”

BabyJane Kenley’s dress looks like it should be strawberry scented.

otterbird I think Sweet P thought they said, “A Night at the Opry.”

Boricua in Texas Kara turned her model into a living, breathing duvet.

BabyJane Her dress can be found at Bed, Bath & The Opera.

GoOnWithoutMe It would have been even better if she’d used shower curtain rings for earrings.

January 18, 2012 at 9:14pm
2 notes

"Guest judge Charlize Theron will repeatedly plug a probably-sucky 'Snow White' movie that isn't scheduled to open until June 1. It's kind of sad that this film's promoters think we'll remember anything we saw on this Top Chef season by the time June 1 rolls around, isn't it?" →